Monday, February 18, 2008

Girl Scouts are Evil

Effing cookies, originally uploaded by Klick Here.

This morning, at approximately 7:00am, I stopped at the grocery store. I had intended to return a DVD that Dan and I rented from the automated machine, but had of course forgotten it at home.
I didn't even stop my car in the parking lot, which is a good thing because devil children were sitting out front of my local Fry's.
OK, maybe they aren't "devil children" per se. But they were achingly cute little girls with pigtail braids who were selling boxes of cookies at 7am. Seriously? Who buys cookies at 7am?
The answer, my friends, is Someone Mean. A coworker of mine brought in said cookies to work today, leaving them out on the counter, with the packages open and the cookies themselves in plain sight! Had the boxes been closed, it would have been bad enough. But to actually have to walk past the cookies and see their peanut buttery goodness...well, it was pure torture. It got so bad that I started walking the long way around the building to get back to my office.
I was breaking out in a cold sweat everytime I knew I had to go to my boss' office, which is exactly in the opposite corner from me, with the kitchen and the Evil Cookies in dead center. I started to relax when lunchtime passed and most of the cookies were gone. I relaxed even further when a coworker forced one of the male coworkers to finish off the last cookie so she wouldn't be tempted herself. Then I received an email from a fellow F4L volunteer who told me that she had been suckered into buying cookies from her neice, couldn't eat them all herself and would be giving a box away to each of us at the next meeting. What kind would I like to place dibs on? And when I kindly thanked her but declined, she told me she wouldn't accept "no" as an answer. Thus, I will be the unwilling recipient of some Thin Mints next week. And will probably need to take a sick day after I eat the entire box... Stupid devil children Girl Scouts. It's a plot against me, I just know it.