Friday, January 4, 2008

New Years Resolutions

I Resolve To:
Drink less Starbucks. I downed this in a nanosecond. Now my stomach is full and happy, but my brain is having trouble processing the caffeine.

Drink fewer energy drinks. My kidney stones probably resemble Mt. Rushmore.

Not be as neurotic as Martha Stewart with a guilt complex. Heck, who am I kidding? I resolve to not develop any more neurotic tendencies. Well, not too many more at least.

Not procrastinate as much. I'm off to a bad start, as this is January4th and I'm just now making my resolutions.

Keep my phone within easy access. I get a lot of complaints that I never answer my phone because it is almost always on silent at the bottom of my purse.

Keep my purse clean. It is where paper scraps, loose change and lipgloss tubes go to die.

Use more phrases. Dan has weird ones like being between a hard place and a stone, or something. And something about a gift card going before a gift horse...I think. Anyway, I need to learn to not only figure out what they mean, but memorize and use them. It seems to be an east-coast thing and I am not part of the family until I begin to use old sayings.

Tone down my own annoying phrases. "That's how I roll," "For reals" and "World of No" are my top offenders. "That's what she said" will be used more frequently.

Use "That's what she said" correctly. I tend to say it no matter the circumstance. It's pretty hit or miss.

Get along with Dan's friends. Some of them are weird, but I promise to try and accept them as normal humans. Except the WOW guild members. A person can only take so much.

Take more pictures. Hey! This might be the first resolution I actually can accomplish!

Scrapbook more often. (The taking pictures one might be the only resolution I accomplish...)

Not avoid the doctor and Dan's nagging to go to the doctor. It's not Dan's fault that the first doc I visited made me feel violated. And she refused to cuddle afterwards. I will try my darndest to go to the doctor when I am not feeling well or when I am bleeding from the head. For reals.


The Noisy Plume said...

You are hilarious.
I am adding you to my blogroll
PERMANENTE (that's Italian for "forever")

(I think)